Sunday, March 8, 2009

1. At a size 14, I often wonder what sex is like if you're thinner. However, a lot of times I feel plush and womanly.

2. Oral sex is the only way I can get off, and my current boyfriend makes that almost impossible sometimes. He tries WAY too hard (usually he ends up looking like he ran a 5k marathon afterwards) and therefore I feel pressured to perform.

3. Making this list has made me decide to tell my partner exactly what I want.

4. I am convinced that one day I will have an abortion (even though I am on birth control and never let anyone come inside me unless they're wearing a condom). If there is the slightest inconsistency in my menstrual cycle, I spend a lot of time trying to mentally prepare myself for that event.

5. I had a one night stand one time only, and at first I couldn't figure out why I did it because a) I didn't like him that much b) It was out of my character and c) I wasn't horny. I realized later that I did it to get back at someone and I'm really surprised at myself.

6. I have HPV and I don't think sex with new people is impossible, but I'm utterly clueless about etiquette in this type of situation. I might be crazy, but I feel like this will only lead me to the best relationship of my life.

7. I like erotic fiction. I don't read it terribly often, but when I do I find myself attracted to stories about losing virginity, because losing mine was so fiercely typical I almost feel cheated, even though it was with someone I loved at the time.

8. I've always wondered what it would be like to watch two people having sex right in front of me. Or better, if they can't see me. However, I don't feel strongly enough to ever actually make it happen.

9. I had what I call an "almost threesome" which consisted of making out and being fingered by two guys. Even though it caused me quite a bit of drama, I would never take it back and I'm proud of myself.

10. I used to be silent during sex - never made a peep. I have been pleaded with to moan, and I never could bring myself to do it. Now I find myself doing it mostly to give my partner confidence but find it distracting.

11. My most recent sexual idea for me and my boyfriend of 2 years is to have drunk sex. Obviously, we are running out of ideas to "spice things up."

12. I find carnivals/festival type places really romantic. When I was about 13 I was sitting at the top of a ferris wheel with my gay best friend (unbeknownst to me at the time) wishing he would kiss me and was really disappointed when he didn't. Two years later, I had my first kiss at that event.

13. In my first relationship, I had times where once he satisfied me I didn't feel like returning the favor. I stupidly never imagined it would happen to me and now I would never do that again.

14. The relationships I end up in are always with guys who like most girls. The kind who has a crush on all his female friends as long as they are nice and somewhat attractive in one way or another. It's annoying and I wish they, AND I, knew how to be more selective.

15. My current boyfriend has literally the sweetest kiss - his breath is almost ALWAYS like candy.

16. I'd really love to have sex outside, but I can't think of ANYWHERE private enough. I think it would make me feel more connected to everything.

17. The best orgasms I've ever had are the ones I've given myself.

18. I'd never try anal because I think I would feel degraded.

19. Daydreaming about sex is something I rarely do anymore, but did a LOT of in high school.

20. I enjoy the intimacy of sex more than the actual sensations.

21. I have hardly any memories of the sex I had with my 2nd partner. We only did it a handful of times (both absolutely sober) but you'd think that would make them more memorable?

22. I like to be seduced slowly and treated like a goddess, but I don't think that has happened in a really long time.

23. Male moaning makes me hot.

24. I only swallow when I feel my significant other has earned it by pleasing me outside the bedroom.

25. I can't get over the idea that it's the male's job to make sure the sex is good, even though that's probably unfair.