Monday, February 7, 2011

1. I stopped considering myself a virgin when I was 18 after spending a week in Chicago with a woman that I had worked with and fallen in love with in Alaska over the summer. At that point, I wasn’t sure exactly what counted as women losing their virginity to each other, but something happened that week that was different from anything I had previously experienced.

2. I love, love, love long hair. Women, men, doesn’t matter. The thought of fucking someone with hair flying everywhere is amazing.

3. I was once involved in a three-way makeout session in college with a man and a lady. At the time, I was seventeen, and thought it was so bad-ass that the three of us all went to breakfast together in the morning. We wondered (loudly and often) if the waitress had any suspicions.

4. I almost drunkenly made out with my best female friend in high school. I am glad I did not.

5. I orgasm quickly for a woman. Sometimes it happens WAY too quickly.

6. I dated a woman in college who was great at giving oral sex. Because I would come way too quickly, she would accuse me of faking it. Trust me, I was NOT.

7. I started watching hetero porn this summer and was surprised by how much it turned me on. Not anything professionally done, but I find amateur couples so hot.

8. I love having my fingers sucked.

9. I didn’t have vaginal intercourse with a man until I was 25. I felt very grown-up, for some reason, even though this was something all my friends had been doing for years.

10. I only had one orgasm with this man, and then I broke up with him via Facebook. I still feel a little guilty about it.

11. I think I like the feeling of hard cock pressed up against my leg more than I actually like it inside of me. Maybe I just need to try it again with someone else.

12. I love making out in my tent. That Marmot has seen some action.

13. I really like the idea of a guy coming on me, shooting all over my breasts or belly. That turns me on a lot. Definitely on my “to-do” list.

14. I dated a boy in high school who had long black hair and wanted to make out everywhere: my mother’s car, public parks in our suburb, outside of coffee shops, in my bedroom when my parents were home. Maybe this is why I like the feeling of hard cock against my leg.

15. I love loud moaning, grunting, any kind of sex noise. Sometimes I would hear them when I was retrieving my laundry in college and would stop outside the door to listen and get jealous.

16. I gave my long-term girlfriend her first orgasm EVER in the employee housing of the National Park I was working in at the time. I am still proud of that one.

17. I love playing with my nipples when I masturbate.

18. Having sex with a woman to Ani Difranco may be the most cliché thing ever, but I still enjoy it.

19. My first sexual experience with a man was terrible. I was locked into a neighbor’s house and forced to touch his penis. Maybe this is why I am still afraid to look at them.

20. This person was also technically my first kiss. However, I don’t count him, but rather the long-black-haired boy mentioned in number 14.

21. I started masturbating when I was 13. I don’t think that I got really, really good at it until this year, though.

22. I love the kind of sex that is so frantic that both parties only manage to get their pants off and shirts stay on because the top half of your body becomes somehow, er, less important.

23. I had my first big, penetrative orgasm in the basement of my parents’ house over a winter break during college. Hopefully they are still unaware of this.

24. I get big teacher/professor crushes on my female professors. This makes me afraid to speak in their classes, because I am just SURE THEY CAN TELL that I think about their boobs. (This is silly at my age in graduate school, I know, but it still goes on.)

25. The best place to have any kind of sexual activity occur is the Seaside Farm in Homer, Alaska. Those cabin beds have probably seen more than I like to imagine, but the beach! The raspberry patch! The swing! So beautiful and erotic.